Focus

I haven't had much to say lately. Frankly, I've not been in a great mood. I've been bored, frustrated, tired, and cranky. It was pretty ridiculous. Yesterday I spoke with Marianne (my best friend I keep talking about) and felt better for all of five minutes. Why is that? Honestly, it's because Marianne can't give me what I need. Jesus alone can. So, I went and did my Bible study and felt led to revisit a Bible study I had done when we lived in Vernon. (01-04) I was still not in a good mood so when I couldn't get the door to the cabinet the Bible study was in open I got really mad. I prayed the way you do when you have nothing left. I was completely honest with God. I told Him that I was frustrated and bored and tired and ready for everything to not be so hard. I told Him how desperately I needed to hear from Him right now. This instant.

I decided to get online and visit a blog that I have recently found and in getting there I ran across an audio message by Beth Moore. It was called Preparing for a fresh work of God. A fresh work of God is something I am desperate for right now. So I listened. And God answered my prayer.

Repentance. I'm sure most of you have heard or studied about repentance. I have too. And while most of what was said I already knew I needed to be reminded. Repentance is not regret. Repentance is heart and will. I desire(heart) for things to be different and I am determined(will) to do what it takes to make things different. (the Holy Spirit alone gives us His power to make changes. We must determine and then He supplies the power to act.) I was also reminded that while there are many priviledges to being a part of the Kingdom of God there are also obligations. Making our best effort to live a godly life is an obligation. As I was typing this I felt led to look up the definition of obligation. Yes, it means what you think it means but this meaning stuck out to me: debt of gratitude, loyalty, affection. Our obligations to the Kingdom of God are not merely duty, they are a response of gratitude, loyalty, affection. I have to throw this in there and then I will move on: To whom do your actions, words, even thoughts, say that you are loyal? I want mine to say I'm loyal to Christ alone.

That was not where I was planning on going with this, but that is where God took me. Through the message I heard, the Word I read and some conversations I had yesterday I realized my problem was my focus. I had taken my focus off Jesus. I had focused on my circumstances, my emotions, my wants. I repented and last night and today are much better. I am putting everything I have into pleasing Christ, living a godly life. And it is very possible that I will loose my forcus again, but I am diligent in trying to keep that from happening.(reading/studying the Word, prayer, actively participating in the body of Christ, making the lifestyle changes God tells me to make)

Please join with me, friends, and let us show the world to whom we are loyal! Jesus Christ the King!!!

"Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is near." Matthew 3:2